Now, this is a subject that I think I know something about. After all I have been sleeping in a bed most of my life. Those beds have linens…I always called them sheets and bedding…I always called them blankets or bedspreads. Then there are the pillows. I usually sleep on a pillow also. Being so familiar with this stuff I think qualifies me to write about the subject. While I was at my daughter’s house I happened to look at a magazine on her coffee table. It was called Garnet Hill. I found out very quickly that I didn’t have a clue about this stuff. The only thing that I remember about sheets is that you usually want a high thread count, i.e. the higher the thread count the better. So far so good. Unfortunately for me, that is really the depth of my knowledge. I know that in a sheet set there is a flat sheet and a fitted sheet. The most important thing to remember is that it is virtually impossible to fold a fitted sheet. I think there are specific things that you do to make the folding come out ok. Kathy used to try to show me how to do it and I never really paid attention. Usually, out of frustration she would go ahead and fold the fitted sheet herself. I am not going to get into pillows. There are many options. I know I don’t like the ones that go flat when you lay on them and never come back up. Most of my knowledge about pillows comes from the My Pillow guy. The main thing I remember there was that they are made in the USA and I like to buy American. I was a big advocate for My Pillow and wanted to buy them for all of my family. I slowed my roll so they didn’t become everyone’s Christmas Present. Just as well.
Now we are going to get into the main subject of this article. I opened the Garnet Hill magazine and it was like opening a window into another world. Basically, for me, if the sheets are clean and smooth I am good. Regular cotton in the summer and flannel in the winter. Honestly, I don’t pay that much attention to thread count. If the sheets are comfortable that is enough for me. Then there are the blankets and “bedding”. Again lightweight in the summer and nice and warm in the winter. I don’t even think about what they are made of or if that even makes a difference. I suddenly was introduced to some of the jargon of linens and bedding. I don’t know if this changes anything really but if I wanted to impress people at a cocktail party…mostly the women I think I could throw in some of these terms and have instant credibility or they would quickly leave the discussion and wonder who the hell this guy is. I honestly have no business talking about this stuff but I think for the purpose of this article I need to share some of these descriptions for the uninitiated. There is the “Reconstructed Heritage” line that effortlessly blends Shaker and Colonial elements with contemporary colors and textures for a look that is timeless. Now suddenly I am not going to have sticker shock when I am told what these things cost. Then there is “Traditional Reimagined” made from “European Flax”. Whatever that is. Then there is “Solid Relaxed” linen and bedding items. “Chunky Waffle Weave Organic Cotton” “Treviso Hand Tufted Wool” “Twisted Rib Cashmere”. Then there is “Embellished Relaxed Linen”…come on. Finally, how about “Solid relaxed organic cotton”, ok I’m done with this. First of all, how do you identify this stuff without an expert at your side? Is this just a fancy way of saying sheets and blankets? Bottom line, am I going to sleep better if I am surrounded by Embellished Relaxed Linen and kept warm with a Twisted Rib Cashmere Blanky. Just paying for these things might cause me some sleep disruption. Having said that, if I could identify some of these products there is little doubt that I would love them and want them on my bed. It certainly enhances the entire buying experience and makes you want to elevate the quality of the stuff in your linen closet. For now, I am going to continue using the sheets I have along with the quilt that Kathy made. It isn’t relaxed, embellished, chunky, twisted, solid, reimagined, or made with any European Flax, but I love it and to date continue to sleep pretty well except when I think of that person who made the quilt.